Despite this brilliant usage of code, they still can’t make the Zune do anything phenomenal when interfacing with the Xbox, and - more annoyingly - you still can’t open up a “now playing” screen to choose which song plays whilst in a game. Still, the new Xbox Guide screen (mini-blades) is very sharp, and the entire system looks and feels much better than it did before.

Thanks for the free revitalization, Microsoft. It’s not really a game-changer, but it’s a generous gift indeed. It should open up some new doors and hold everyone over until the next system comes around.

Just kidding. But more importantly, who would name his or her child “Jon Kyl“? Why take two perfectly reasonable first names, drop one letter from each, and then combine them to make such a pretentious title?

I’m a bit scatterbrained as I have recently undergone strenuous testing over nearly every anatomical feature of the human head and neck (who would’ve thought there could be so much contained in such a small space?). However, the examination marked the end of my experience with human corpses, which I’ll consider a good thing. It was a great learning experience, but I won’t miss it (or the smell) too much.

Next on the agenda: more class, then more studying, followed by more video games. “Working for the weekend” should probably be frowned upon, but should “learning for the weekend” be equally discouraged? Every approaching break looks more and more appetizing…

But isn’t life beautiful?

I wish I were part of a gang.

Speaking of humor, on to things that aren’t so funny: “Tropic Thunder.” I thought the previews showed promise, and we all know Ben Stiller is incapable of making a bad movie, but it just didn’t deliver (at least not after the first few minutes). Robert Downey Jr. was merely all right, Jack Black was awful, and everyone else was forgettable. But here’s a spoiler for those who haven’t seen it: Tom Cruise. That’s all that can be said.

The same premise would have turned out so much better if Broken Lizard had been involved.

His success was staggering and he should be commended for his accomplishments. His later works weren’t all five-star caliber, but they were nevertheless entertaining, and always thought-provoking. He took some flak for arguing against the impending “crisis” of global warming, but his objections were well-founded and deserved attention. This is an interesting read on the subject.

What can be learned from the passing of an intelligent mind? The transient nature of life, carpe diem, etc… But mostly, if you’re good at something, you should pursue it. Other people will thank you for it, and remember you for it, later. And you will have made their lives that much more enjoyable.

Or you could take the “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington” stance, believing that there is good to be done and that someone must do it. And indeed someone should. But many people who would be best at positions of leadership are not the types of people who would actually pursue such offices. This is a truth that has always been manifested in our society and it would seem that our political system has suffered for it.

What results is that a far greater level of success could likely be achieved by writing in a candidate against his will. Of course, this is completely impractical given modern electoral contrivances. Drastic overhaul of the voting process, though it could be beneficial, is highly unlikely; small changes accruing over time would serve the population best.

The day will be a beautiful one when the continual Samaritan is rewarded with the ability to do good for all, rather than a select few. If only we knew who that person was… In the meantime, we’ll just continue to settle for the lesser of two evils.

First, use a scalpel to incise the skin about the calvarium. Remove and discard this excess skin. Using a chisel, or other jagged object, remove all overlying fascial and muscle layers in a similarly circumferential manner. Now it’s time to enjoy inhaling some human “bonedust.” Utilize a high-powered saw (note: contrary to popular belief, a scalpel is insufficient to get through bone) to cut through the skull in this ring, taking care not to cut too deep (or too shallow) - you’ll know when you’re in. Apply upward force on the calvarium while using a scalpel or chisel to free this bone from the adhesive dura of the brain.

Now you’ve got your brain. Incise the dura (preserving the falx cerebri and superior sagittal sinus, if desired) and reflect it to reveal the substance of the cerebrum. Removing the brain should be done with care. Use a scalpel to slice the cranial nerves, internal carotid artery, and pituitary stalk, as well as the vertebral arteries and spinal cord. The tentorium cerebelli should be cut in order to keep the brain intact upon removal. Lift the brain and the job is done.

Note that before any of these steps are followed, you should: A) ensure that your subject is dead, and B) either be officially licensed by the state to perform such a procedure, or be willing to be hunted by the law. Further information regarding the restoration of life to a disembodied brain may be found by combing the Internet.

I was trying to make it to a soccer game; it’s a physically painful experience to miss minute after minute of playing time while surrounded by stagnant traffic. But the truly fantastic part is that I got there literally just in time to see my teammates leaving - defeated by five goals. I don’t think the trip would have been nearly as epic if I had made it five minutes earlier (in time to see the very end of the game), or if I had come five minutes later (when everyone had left).

I simply cannot understand how, even though there are so many cars, we couldn’t move forward at a quicker pace. I remember wishing at the time that I could see a satellite view of the traffic flow…what were they doing? Were those in the lead vehicles getting out to play croquet in the street? I doubt this problem existed when horse carriages were gallivanting around.

I don’t think I’ll be leaving an hour and a half before my next game, but I will know not to go the same route. I may even splurge and pay to take the toll road, if only to save a tiny bit of sanity.

I was initially put off by some of the “moral freedoms” the game allows the player, but the game designers obviously wanted to mimic much of the real world and what results is really not so bad. After all, what would be good if there were no capacity for evil? Making in-game options for some pretty dastardly and generally-considered “inappropriate” behaviors does not mean that someone is forced to take part in such activities; on the contrary, he should feel a greater sense of satisfaction in knowing what he could have done and still abstaining.

Giving the player a pet dog for a constant ally is a nice touch, as are many other little features. But combat feels extremely easy (granted, it’s very early on, but I’ve probably only been hit twice) and the auto-aiming is a bit much. Social interaction does indeed suck - all it takes to raise someone’s affection is farting in their direction, or showing off your muscles. In a matter of minutes I had three women ready to be wedded.

The little distractions are enjoyable though. Rather than rushing right to the wedding, I found it more enjoyable to work long hours at the blacksmith, forging swords, and then ran to the bar for some gambling. As Mitch would say, you’ve got to get your priorities crooked. Undoubtedly my “good” character has at least a handful of nefarious acts ahead of him, but all I want is a simple job, a quiet farm, and an ugly child.

I look forward to actually making some progress in the game before my real-world responsibilities once again envelop me. It doesn’t look as though it will be as engrossing a game as Oblivion was, but maybe that void will be filled by Fallout 3. Ahh, so many games to play…and no time at all…

I just couldn’t resist…sometimes, doing stupid things beats studying. Actually, I suppose that’s true all of the time. If I had really been bold, I would’ve attempted to show the ensuing battle, or - worse still - the explicit “Galea Aponeurotica.” It’s illegal in 38 states.